For When
by DeanLittle67
Summary: Five years after losing Logan, Rory finds it in herself to try and continue with her life. Sequel to Don't Say Goodbye. Rogan. Finn/Rory.
1. Chapter 1

_I love you. I need you to know that before I continue writing this letter. I need you to believe it. I love you, and I know you love me too. I don't know how much time will have passed between the time I broke your heart and when you read this. I know you're hating yourself for reading this, for feeling those feelings of love for somebody else. I know you._

 _I need you to know that it's okay. I never expected you to never move on, to never find another person who would love you like I do. Any man would be lucky enough to love you, would be lucky enough for you to love him back. If I have an inkling of who it might be, I hope it's Finn. He's loved you for as long as I have. I had to pry that admittance out of him, but it came with a string of apologies and guilt. If I hadn't stolen your heart when I did, he would have._

 _It's okay to love again. I want you to be happy, and whoever it is - Finn or not (even though I'm almost one-hundred percent sure it's Finn) will make you happy. If you're even considering the possibility of being in love with them, I know they make you happy._

 _Love them like you love me. They will love you the same, but hopefully treat you better. Hopefully they will never break your heart like I have. I love you, again and always. Be kind, love with all your heart, and be happy._

She hadn't fully prepared herself to read the letter, for him to tell her it was okay to love again. She wasn't ready to accept it, but he had. He had accepted that she'd be in love long before she considered even considering it. Setting the letter on the counter, she cradled her head in her hands and let her eyes close as she tried to comprehend everything going on in her life and her mind.

There wasn't a single point in time that she could point to and say that it's where she started falling for Finn. A part of her knew Logan was right, though. There had always been that seed planted in her heart, ready to grow. She'd felt it with every movie they'd watched together when Logan wasn't around, felt it with every second after they'd lost him. It had always been there, and it terrified her.

Her mind shifted to her world, Eli. Finn had always acted like a dad for Eli. He was the one who'd helped him learn to ride a bike, had been there for every birthday and school event. Hell, he'd gone to every t-ball game. She knew Finn loved Eli, and now she wondered if he loved the boy like a son. She wondered if Eli would be able to love Finn like a father. Quickly, she started worrying if she was trying to replace Logan in her life, in their son's life.

"Mom," she said after dialing the familiar number. "I need your help." After explaining the entire situation, still seated at the counter, the elder Lorelai chuckled on the other end of the phone. She didn't understand what was so humorous about her situation.

"Babe, I saw this coming for a while now. I know you've probably read one of Logan's letters, because surely he wrote one for something like this. Listen to it! He hasn't been wrong so far with those letters. Now, my advice for you is to follow your heart. You're going to have doubts and concerns. Talk to Finn, figure whatever this is out. That boy is head over heels for you. Now, I've gotta get back before Michel and Sookie kill each other, but think about it, okay?" She took a deep breath as she lifted her head from the crane position she'd assumed and looked at the picture on the refrigerator.

With a smile she answered her mom. "I will. Thanks." She hung up the phone, setting it down on the counter next to the letter. Taking another deep breath, she stood from her spot and walked upstairs to the bedroom to get dressed. As she climbed the stairs, she looked at the pictures. They hadn't changed or been added to since they'd lost Logan. The one of his high school graduation and the ones of him, Colin, and Finn still hung in their original spots. The ones from their wedding still at the top. She smiled as she remembered that day, his words, the feeling of his lips on hers.

There was a lot she still remembered about him. Some days when she made her morning coffee, instinctually, she'd make a coffee for him - two sugars with a tablespoon of French Vanilla creamer. It would sit on the counter all day before she realized what she'd done, then she poured it out, typically along with tears falling down her cheeks. She didn't cry over him much anymore. That wasn't saying she never did as she'd shown earlier that day. There were days she woke up from a dream of him to an empty bed. She'd smell the bottle of cologne that still sat on the dresser, remembering how he smelled.

Rummaging through the closet, she chose a simple button-up with rolled up sleeves and a pair of jeans. She wasn't planning on leaving the house, so her feet remained bare. Her hand brushed over the separating factor between her half of the closet and his, a t-shirt she'd seen him wear a thousand times before - the one he was wearing when he proposed.

"Hey, Love," she heard Finn say from downstairs. "I figured I'd stop by before I have to go pick Eli up." Smiling, she walked back downstairs as she pulled her hair up in a loose bun. She saw him standing in the middle of the living room with a smile on his face.

"How did your presentation go with the whole 'Bring Your Dad to School' thing?" They both sat on the couch, facing each other. She brought her legs up under her, leaning towards him slightly.

"It went fairly well. I talked about the hotel business and what I did for it. Then I talked about what Logan did, explaining that he was Eli's dad but that he couldn't be there. Eli was beaming the entire time and before I left, he gave me this big bear hug." Eli had always gotten along with Finn. After losing Logan, he was the only one who could get the young boy to calm down. She didn't know if it was because Finn was the calmest of them all or it was just because he was a guy, but it worked.

"I can't thank you enough for this, Finn. It means a lot to me, and it meant even more to Eli." He just smiled, pulling her in for a hug. It was different with Finn than it had been with Logan. Logan's hugs were always gentle, as if she was going to break. Finn on the other hand gave her bone-crushing hugs, ones that rather than feeling breaking felt safe like a security blanket. When they pulled apart, she was smiling again as she thought of the letter.

"Finn," she said timidly, keeping eye contact with him. "For the past five years, you've been through this journey with me. I lost my husband and you lost your best friend, and you've been raising Eli like your own son. I don't know how to thank you enough. I need to be honest with you though." Taking a deep breath, she tried to gauge his reaction. He looked concerned, worried. He didn't have a reason to be, but he didn't know that. It reminded her of when Logan came back from London and she thought he was going to break up with her. This time, the true news was much happier.

"Rory. You don't," she cut him off, grabbing his hand in hers as he tried to stand. Pulling him back down, she smiled softly again.

"Finn. I think I'm falling in love with you." His eyes got wide. She saw him swallow the lump she knew was in his throat. His grip on her hand got a little tighter. "It's been five years, Finn. You've been there for everything. You were there for everything before we lost him. I pulled out the box, knowing he had to have written a letter for this moment. He did. He told me if he hadn't stolen my heart, you would have. Finn, this feeling isn't new to me. He was right. There was always that idea that if he wasn't there, I would have fallen for you. I am now."

She didn't know what was going through his mind, but she felt him relax and could hear him sigh softly. They stayed sitting there for a moment longer before he leaned in slowly and their lips brushed softly.

She knew she wasn't going to forget Logan or stop loving him. There was still that small amount of guilt she felt. She shouldn't have been falling in love with his best friend, but here she was, sitting on their couch kissing Finn. And it was the first time anything felt right since her last day with Logan.

A/N: I'm back, as promised. I feel like I've finally found a good balance between the Rogan and the Finn/Rory. As I had told you, this is still very much Rogan and I'm hoping I showed it. I have some news, too. I've decided that with some editing and some minor changes, I will try and get Don't Say Goodbye published. I'll let you guys know how that's going, but it will affect how often I update this story. It's probably not going to be as often as DSG was, but I'll try to update every few days. As always, I hope you enjoy and I can't wait to read your reviews on this story as well!


	2. Chapter 2

The two had been trying to make it work, trying to make sure the transition was as easy as possible for both Rory and Eli. However, they didn't foresee the reaction of one of their closest friends.

"You've got to be kidding me!" Colin exclaimed as he paced the length of the living room. Finn and Rory had just told him they'd been seeing each other for the past three months. It had been working out fine, their daily routines not changing much. Eli was glad to have Finn around more than when they weren't together, and Rory was glad that he finally had a more steady father figure. Finn was to Eli what Luke was to Rory. "This is _not_ okay! This isn't supposed to happen!"

"Colin," Rory said softly, calmly. With some hesitation, she continued. "Logan's been dead for five years. It's okay for me to move on, for us all to move on. It's what he would have wanted. Hell, in his letter, he said he hoped it was Finn." She could feel the lump rising in her throat and she tried to swallow it, tried to blink back the tears stinging her eyes. Finn just squeezed her hand.

"You weren't supposed to fall in love with one of Logan's best friends. You were supposed to move on, Rory! You were supposed to find someone completely different than him and realize that it was okay, not this," Colin finally said, head bowed and eyes closed. He'd finally stopped pacing, and she finally understood.

"Colin," she sighed. "If…" She shook her head, standing up and separating her hand from Finn's. "I'll be back. Mom has Eli until tomorrow. You two, figure this out. I need to clear my head."

It was February sixth, snow still blanketing the ground. With this knowledge, she grabbed her coat, hat, and gloves before walking out into the garage. Rather than getting into her Prius, she got into his Porsche. She hadn't sat in the car since she'd lost him, hadn't even thought of driving it. It still smelled like him, his jazz CD still playing over the speakers when she started the engine. The engine purred as she drove the twists and turns into Hartford and then out of Hartford until she passed through the gates she was looking for. Slowing down, she found what she was looking for - who she was looking for. Climbing out of the car, she took the gloves off and played with her rings.

"Hey," she said softly, hand resting on the cold marble. She brushed the snow off, revealing his name. "I miss you, you know that?" Tears stung her eyes again, and she tried to hold them back. "I really miss you. Colin is freaking out about me and Finn, and I wish you were here to calm him down. But if you were here I wouldn't be in this mess." Her tears were streaming down her cheeks. "I know I just talked to you last month for your birthday and for the anniversary, but it's not enough. Why did you have to leave?" She practically yelled her question at the stone. "Why did you have to leave me and Eli? Why didn't you fight for us? Did you not love us enough? Did you love us too much? I need you back, Logan!" She fell to her knees, head bowed as her hand rested on his name. "I need you so much. I miss you. Eli misses you. Nothing's the same. I remember when you were telling me how it felt to know you were dying those last few days, and you told me it was like when we jumped off the scaffold. I'm not feeling that right now. I'm feeling like I just fell off the cliff. My life just feels like it's been in a tailspin since you've been gone, and I don't know how to fix it. I don't know what to do, and I know you'd tell me what to do and maybe that's why I came here and ran from the problem at home and maybe that's why I'm so mad at you because I know my life would be fine if you were here." She took a deep breath as she opened her eyes. "I just need you to tell me what to do." She wasn't expecting anybody to answer, so she was startled when a familiar voice spoke behind her.

"He'd want you to be happy," Honor said softly. Rory stood, turning to face her friend. "He'd tell you to be happy. It doesn't matter what Colin or Shira or Lorelai or anybody else thinks or feels. What's going on between you and Finn is between you and Finn." Biting her bottom lip, she nodded, knowing Honor was right. "And to answer one of your questions, he did fight for you guys. By giving up on treatments, he gave you and Eli those last few months with him - for the most part - pain free. Had he fought, you know he'd be lying in a hospital bed until the end, hooked up to tubes and wires, in more pain that we could imagine. He loved you guys too much to put you through that. He didn't want Eli remembering him like that."

"I just miss him," was all Rory could say in response. Her voice was soft, breaking with every few words as she tried to hold the tears back again. The snow fell around them. She'd hated snow ever since she lost him, it never bringing positivity after that. It was always full of pain.

"We all miss him, Rory. You've never been alone in that aspect, never been alone in any aspect." She nodded as she realized she never noticed how similar Honor and Logan looked. She hadn't seen the woman often, birthdays and holidays at most. She never understood Honor's distance since losing her brother, but it was there. It had hurt Rory almost as much as losing Logan. Not only was she losing Logan, but she was losing one of her closest friends along with him.

"Honor, why did you leave?" She had to know. Now that Honor was standing there in front of her, she couldn't overlook the fact that Eli's aunt hadn't been a part of his life. He'd seen her on his birthdays and for Christmas. He didn't call her Aunt Honor, just Honor or ma'am - like the polite boy he was. With her question, she saw the woman tense up before sighing and relaxing.

"I had just lost my brother," she said softly. "I had lost the one person who made life with our parents bearable. I lost the one person I was supposed to protect and keep safe. I couldn't save him from this, Rory. And then, looking at Eli was like a slap in the face. He looks exactly like Logan did, except for his eyes. And looking at him, being around him. It was all too much for me. I'm sorry for not being there, and then we lost Mitchum. He was my daddy, and it just felt like my world was crashing down and I just had to get away for good. I actually came here to share some news with my brother, but now I guess you too since you're here." Rory nodded, stepping aside and taking a few steps back as Honor knelt in front of the grave. With a deep breath she spoke again.

"Hey, Logie." Rory took a minute to look at the scene. This wasn't how it was supposed to be. When Honor had news, she shouldn't have been talking to a headstone. No, she should have been talking to her brother. "You're going to be an uncle. I know, it's crazy right. Josh had been pushing for a while, but with everything with you and then Daddy… We hope it's a little girl, but we'll be happy with a boy. I know I haven't been here often, but it's not the same…" Rory walked away as Honor continued to talk to her brother, allowing the woman space.

She didn't know if Honor's answer to her question gave her closure or not. She had needed her, they all had, and Honor had abandoned them with an apology note. She hoped that the new addition to the family would bring them closer together, but at the same time she knew not to get her hopes up. If there was one thing about the Huntzbergers, it was that they could always disappoint. She thought of Shira, alone. Not only had the woman lost her son, but then also Elias and then Mitchum, followed by Honor cutting ties. The woman was alone, barely seeing her grandson. Rory didn't know what to think of those thoughts, pushing them from her mind as she got back into the Porsche and making her way back to the house.

When she got back, Finn's car was still in the drive, but Colin's was gone. She could only hope that the two had gotten things figured out, or at least come to a quasi-agreement with the situation. The hot air was blowing on her face, and she shivered when she turned the car off.

"Finn," she called out as she walked into the house. It was quiet, ominous. "I'm back. Finn?" She walked further into the house only to see him sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. It was a position she knew all too well, having sat like that many times before. Shrugging off her jacket, she tossed it on the chair before sitting next to him with her hand resting on his knee.

"He's not happy with it, but he's accepting it," Finn told her softly. He still hadn't moved from his position, but he was talking. That had to count for something, right? "He always expected you to move on, but he never thought it would be with me. I think that's what hurt him the most. He sees it as me betraying Logan. He finally looked up at her. "Am I betraying Logan, Love?"

"Oh, Finn," she replied softly, pulling him into a hug. "You're not betraying Logan. He knew you had feelings for me, he told us both that he was okay with this happening when the time came. If anything, you had his blessings." He wrapped his arms around her, holding her close. She was starting to doubt it, since he had doubts. What if those thoughts were too much for him? She couldn't loose him, and she didn't want to explain to Eli why he wasn't around anymore.

That night, Finn already asleep in their bed, she stood at the dresser. She avoided looking into the mirror, not wanting to see what she was doing. Looking down at her hands, she spun the rings around her finger before slowly pulling them off. It was time. It was time for her to allow herself to be happy, to move on. Would she stop loving Logan? Never. She'd always love him, but that didn't mean that she wasn't allowed to love somebody else. After putting the rings in the jewelry box atop the dresser, she turned to look at the sleeping Australian in her bed. She was allowed to love somebody else, and she realized she was starting to fall in love with Finn.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Very filler-y, I know. And so much angst. Worry not, though! Next chapter will be lighter and more fluffy! As always, I love your reviews. Some questions will be answered soon, I promise. Keep them coming! I love reading the comments and reviews. Enjoy!

" _I love you." With a smile, she rested her head on his chest as his arms wrapped around her to hold her close. It was his first visit from London after surprising her on the rooftop. It was a perfect moment, the stars above them. His jacket had been discarded once they'd laid down, the buttons of his shirt digging into her cheek, but she didn't care. He was there with her._

" _I miss you, Logan," she told him softly. He kissed the top of her head as she ran patterns over his hand. She hated that he was so far away, so this moment felt special. It felt like everything they were going through was going to end up okay. Finally, she looked up at him and he captured her lips with his, the two moving together. She felt his hands slip up the back of her shirt as she straddled him, their lips continuing to move together._

 _Her shirt was discarded, tossed next to his jacket as her fingers fumbled with the buttons on his shirt until his chest was exposed. She kissed down along his neck to his chest and stomach. Her lips lingered on the scars from the Costa Rica trip. They weren't red ribbons anymore, faded into the normal bronze of his skin with a slight shimmer. He sat up, shrugging the shirt off as his mouth found the junction of her shoulder and neck._

" _Logan," she managed to sigh, his hands playing with the waistband of her pants. Logan. Logan. She didn't know why she had tears in her eyes. Logan._

She woke up, sitting up fast enough to make her head spin. Logan. Her alarm clock hadn't gone off yet, and when she looked over, she groaned. It was three in the morning and she couldn't sleep. Finn was right next to her, slumbering away, but there she was.

She'd had dreams about him ranging from normal dreams to memories like the one she'd just relived. It was those moments that she loved, but that she hated at the same time. Her dreams allowed her to relive the touches, to remember them in vivid detail, or the way the sun shone in his eyes, or the way he laughed. The small details she was forgetting, she was being reminded of. Slowly, she got out of the bed, not wanting to wake Finn up. As much as she'd love for him to hold her, she wanted somebody else more.

She wondered if there would ever be a moment she'd want Finn more than Logan. It felt like she was putting him second in her heart, and she hated that. A part of her knew that that's why Colin had a problem with them, knowing Finn would always be second. Making her way into the library - the same room that used to be their downstairs bedroom - she grabbed the boxes out of the closet and sat on the floor in the middle of the room.

The Logan boxes held more than just the letters he wrote. They held everything she couldn't look at in her day to day life. The rocket was at the top, and she smiled as she took it out and sat it next to her. She then pulled out a picture of them, one he'd taken when they were laying in bed one night back when they were at Yale. There were pictures from his first birthday they'd celebrated together. A lot of the Logan box were pictures that she couldn't stand to pass by every day - or that were too inappropriate for her to display.

When she was done with the pictures, she looked at the letters, but not opening them. She skimmed through, looking at the titles. For When I Break Your Heart. For When You Fall In Love. For When You Say Yes. For When You Forget. For When You're Angry At Me. Then, she came across one that she felt she could read this time. **For When You Need Me**. She had a feeling this would be a letter she'd read many times, one that she would memorize fast. With shaking hands, she opened the envelope.

 _I hate that you have to hear me from the confines of written words rather than me telling you everything you need to hear in person. I don't know what's made you need to read this, but whatever it is, it'll be okay. You'll figure it out. I know you feel like you're going to need me everyday, but that's not what this letter is for. This is for the moments where you feel like you're breaking, where you feel like me not being there is finally too much for you to deal with. Read this then…_ She put the letter back into the envelope, knowing it wasn't time.

"Rory," she heard Finn say softly from the doorway. With tears in her eyes, she stood up and walked over to him. He enveloped her in his arms as she melted into him with sobs shaking her body. When would he realize this is what life with her would be like? When would he realize that life with her would be coming second? He knew he'd come in second when it came to Eli - everybody coming in second when it came to Eli, even Rory herself. But would he walk when he realized Logan would come first?

"Finn," she finally said after the sobs had turned into silent tears. "I… I don't…"

"I know." Two words and she knew that it would be okay. She knew that he knew by the tone of his voice, the softness, the sadness. "We'll talk when we wake up, okay?" She nodded as he led her back upstairs to the bedroom. The two laid next to each other and she curled into him, her head on his chest.

The next morning, he was playing with her hair when she woke up again. The two sat up, facing each other. "Honor stopped by to take Eli to school. I figured that would be alright," Finn told her right away. She nodded. "What happened last night?"

"I had a dream, or memory, a mix, I guess. It made me realize something I think I should have thought about long before now, back when we agreed to try and make this work. How is this going to work, Finn? I still love him, and I will always love him. And I know you know this, but do you _really_ understand?" He closed his eyes with a sigh before looking at her. She wondered if it was how others felt when they looked at her. His eyes rivaled hers in the contrast of blue, of the vibrancy.

"Rory, Love. I am well aware that your heart will always belong to Logan more than it will anybody else - Eli the exception of course. We're talking about romantic love, and I know that I will never fully compare. Am I okay with this? Honestly, no. But I'll deal with it because I care about you." She nodded. "We will find a way to make this work. Do you still want this to work?"

"Of course I do, Finn!" she exclaimed. She could still see the worry in his eyes, but he smiled. She was falling for him more every day.


	4. Chapter 4

It was May, the month of memories for her. It was coming up on seven years since her Yale graduation, seven years since her marriage, but all of that was in the back of her mind when her six year old son was at his second grade award ceremony. The seat next to her was unoccupied, Finn having supposed to have been the person occupying it, but he had a last minute business meeting preceded by strings of apologies and promises to make it up to them. But those promises or apologies meant nothing. He was missing Eli's celebration.

When her son's name was called, she found herself clapping with such vigor that she felt her hands stinging. Most Adventurous, Honor Roll, and the top reader of his grade. She couldn't have been more proud of him.

Afterwards, she found him in the classroom, packing his belongings into his backpack. He looked sad, and she was sure it was because school was over with for the summer. His love for school rivaled hers, a fact that made her proud. He got his love for learning from her, but he got his smarts from his father. That's what she always told him, because her knowledge was booksmarts, but Logan's was world wide - as was Eli's. When he was done gathering his things, he walked over to her and she hugged him tight before standing up and leading him out of the building.

"You okay, Eli?" she asked once they were in the car. He dropped his bag in the floorboard of the Prius before buckling in. A scowl was plastered on his face, reminding her of his father's temper, the same scowl plastered on Logan's face many times before.

"I told you about Ricky and how he picks on me. Well, today after the awards he comes up to me asking why my dad wasn't there." She pulled onto the highway, glancing into the rearview mirror periodically as Eli continued his story. "I told him my dad couldn't be there because he died and he kept making fun of me. I hate that Dad wasn't there, and I know he couldn't be there. But why wasn't Uncle Finn? He's always there!" Taking a deep breath, she thought about what she was going to say. There wasn't much to say, quite frankly.

"Ricky is a bully," she told him, finally. "Even though Dad couldn't be here doesn't mean he wouldn't have been proud of you. You're becoming more like him every day! You take risks, you try new things, you love to read and write. I swear, the only thing you get from me is the eyes. You are Logan's boy in every way." When she said this, she saw him smile, his face beaming. "And you know Uncle Finn would have been here, but something happened at work. You know how Finn's work is and how sometimes he has to leave suddenly. But I know that when he gets back, he'll take you out to celebrate. You're a third grader now! Now, how about on the way home, we stop for ice cream?" The boy nodded his head vigorously and she smiled, turning on the Disney CD and allowing it to play over the speakers. Eli sang along, dancing.

For a moment, she lived in the moment, forgetting about Logan and Finn. Maybe she needed to swear off men in general, save for Eli. Eli was her world. She woke up every day for him, lived for him. He was the reason for her even still being there. Had they not had Eli, after Logan died, she would have left Connecticut and made a life for herself anywhere else. She would have been like Honor, running from everybody and everything that reminded her of Logan. But because of Eli, she stayed. She gave him a good life, and she succeeded. She was a single mother of an amazing young boy, was a reporter for the Hartford Gazette, and had an amazing set of friends and an amazing family to be there with her every step of the way.

Once the duo got their ice cream, they sat at one of the tables enjoying. "So, how does it feel to be a third grader?" she asked him with a smile between bites. He just rolled his eyes and continued eating his ice cream. "Okay, fine. So, baseball signups are going on. Did you want to sign up for it this year? I know you loved t-ball."

"Yeah!" he said much more enthusiastically than she would care to admit. He really was his father's son. She barely liked taking walks, let alone sports. She still didn't understand one thing about baseball, and that's where Finn came in to explain it for her.

"Okay, so I'll email the coach about getting you on the team. We're going to the Vineyard again this year. I know you think it's boring, but I think you're going to love it this year," she said with a twinkle in her eye. She really hoped that having Steve and Kwan there this year would make him enjoy it a little more. Lane and Zach were excited as well, having never been to the Vineyard before. "What else do you want to do this summer?" Taking another bite, she saw Eli think hard.

"I want to visit Dad," he finally said. She coughed a couple times in shock. He'd been to see Logan many times, but never on his own accord. He'd been dragged there twice a year every year, occasional visits throughout the rest of the months. "I know you go and talk to him, and Uncle Finn and Uncle Colin go and talk to him, and I want to go and talk to him."

"Honey, you know he won't answer, right?" He looked at her, confused.

"Well, Mrs. Kim says that the people we love answer through God. So, I figure, God will get his message to me." She just nodded, not wanting to bring up the arguments she had against God. If He was real, why did he take Logan from them?

When the two were finished, they threw away their trash before getting back in the car and driving home. It was filled with conversation silence, but Disney still blasted through the speakers. She couldn't help but smile at his dancing and singing, his carefree attitude. If he was one-tenth of what Logan was, she was going to have her hands full.

Once arriving home, Eli grabbed his bag and ran inside and to the library to finish the book he had been reading, _A Series of Unfortunate Events_ , but before he reached the room she heard him yell out. "Uncle Finn!" Walking into the living room, she saw the man hugging Eli tight, a gift in hand.

"I'm sorry I missed the ceremony, buddy, but how about we go to dinner tonight?" Eli nodded as Finn handed him the wrapped present. With the tears of wrapping paper, Eli held the book up for Rory to see. She smiled, laughed, and rolled her eyes.

"I think you're going to have to grow into _War and Peace_." But Eli was excited nonetheless. When he disappeared into the library, Finn wrapped her in a hug and kissed her softly. "I missed you."

"I missed you too, Love. And I really am sorry about that, but Dad's sick and that hotel was on the verge of shutting down." She had heard all the excuses before, all the reasonings on why he was gone or why he missed an event of one kind or another. She hated the excuses, hated that he was able to find a reason for disappearing.

"You need to talk to your dad or the board, something. I can't have you flitting in and out when it comes to Eli. He was looking forward to you being there, Finn, and you crushed him!" He nodded, looking down as she pulled away. "I understand your dad is sick, but they have offices around the world to handle these things. You know that. Are we not enough for you? Are you running every few months because it's getting too serious? Because if that's the case, then I can do something about that." His head whipped up, looking at her with worry and concern.

"I'm not running off, Rory," he told her seriously. "Since his birthday, I haven't been with anybody else. I told you I wanted to make this work, and I've been trying. I'm sorry Dad thinks it's okay to send me off, but I can't blame him since he doesn't know we're serious. If he were to know then things would be different, but as far as he's concerned, I'm still the same Finn I was a year ago." She knew he had a point, having kept their relationship between only their friends. Once word got out, she was afraid of reactions similar to Colin's. And she knew Shira's reaction would be far worse.

"Finn." She couldn't think of an excuse for what they both knew was the truth. "I just _can't,_ not yet at least."

"When, then, Rory? It's been six months. I've shown you I've grown up, I've been serious about both my commitment to you and to Eli. What more do you want from me?" She looked at him with tears in her eyes. There was one thing she wanted him to be, and that was Logan.


	5. Chapter 5

He went to Eli's first baseball practice, the boy picking up on the idea of the game. It wasn't much different from t-ball when it came to gameplay and rules, a pitcher being the main difference. It had been a week since their fight, and he didn't know what to do. She'd been avoiding him and he did the same, going out with Colin or visiting Emily. He found it odd that he visited the elder Gilmore, but she always told him she enjoyed the company.

He understood Rory's hesitancy, but that didn't mean it didn't hurt. He had always put her first from the beginning. He would drop everything - girls included - when she called him to come over for whatever reason, whether it be a fight with Logan or having a bad day. It hurt that she kept pulling and pushing, especially recently. It was as if as soon as they were getting into a good rhythm, she disrupted it with one thing or another. And he knew why. It was Logan. It would always be Logan.

Knowing that he was going to always be second wasn't the problem. It was a fact he'd come to realize and accept early on. The problem was how Rory was handling it. She kept trying to find a reason - any reason - to call off their whole arrangement. He understood her desire of normalcy, but he had a feeling she still didn't understand that normal didn't include Logan anymore. As much as he loved Logan, having been like brothers for so long, he resented him a little bit. He had gotten the girl, loved the girl, married the girl. But he left the girl heartbroken and just plain broken, and now Finn was the one having to pick up the broken pieces.

"We need to talk," he finally told Rory after Eli had gone to bed. Despite having avoiding each other, he kept his routine the same which always included Eli.

"Finn, now is not the time," she responded, turning her back to him and going back to thee article she was working on. With a huff, he sat in the chair next to her, determined.

"Okay. You work, I talk. I'm tired of this, Rory. I'm tired of this push and pull you've been doing, this hot and cold. It ends now." Those last three words made her typing falter as she looked up at him. "You need to decide. In or out. I know you still love Logan, Love. We all do, but you're letting it hold you back. This house, for example, is a time capsule. The only thing that's changed is the downstairs bedroom. His clothes are still in the closet, his cologne still on the dresser. It's been five years. I'm not telling you to forget him or stop loving him, but to start moving on with your life. Move on with me." She looked up at him, shutting her computer. He was waiting for an answer to a question he didn't even ask.

"I love you, Finn. I love the idea of loving you. But I don't know what to do. When we lost Logan, it was as if a part of me was lost with him, if that makes sense." He nodded as she continued talking. "I want to be able to go all in, I really do. I think part of it is being scared - a big part of it. I'm scared of forgetting him, of you leaving us, of disappointing Eli. It scares me to think that I have to factor him into every decision. I realized that long before he was even born, but now with me feeling like it's okay to put myself out there again… I don't want his father figure being like my dad."

"I'm nothing like your father, Love," he reminded her. "Been with you both for everything. A couple of times, yeah, I had to leave for one reason or another, but I always made it up to you guys. More importantly, I always came back." She nodded, a look of thought on her face.

"I'm in, Finn. Officially, one hundred percent in." He smiled, kissing her softly.

He didn't know what to expect. He didn't want her changing things just to make it seem she was okay. But at the same time, he hoped this was giving her that push that she needed to be able to make those changes. He'd noticed some before that day, like when he woke up and she wasn't wearing her wedding rings. It came as a shock, and when he asked, she shrugged and told him it was time. He didn't know what that meant at the time, but he did then. It was time for both of them to change a little bit.

A/N: I know this was much shorter than most of my updates, but I feel like it holds everything it needs to. I hope it answers some of those questions you guys have been asking. As always, I enjoy your reviews and comments. They keep me motivated to push through those tough writer's block moments. I hope you guys enjoyed.


	6. Update

A/N: Hey guys! I know it's been a while since my last update - like 5 or 6 weeks. Has it really been that long? I'm sorry it's been so long. So here's the jist of it. Life is crazy, school is crazy, and most of all Netflix is crazy. I have a tendency to write when I binge-watch a show. Right now, I'm binging Grey's Anatomy. I know, it's blasphemy. So, be on the lookout for some of my Grey's Writing. I will continue to write this when I start binging Gilmore Girls again before the revival, so it might be a couple more weeks. Thank you all for sticking with me throughout this story, and don't worry, it's not abandoned. I hate saying this, but it's on a temporary hiatus... More like Hellatus, am I right? Sorry about my horrible humor. Thank you again.


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